Escher Girls

Float like a butterfly, Sting like a WTF!?

This is a blog to archive and showcase the prevalence of certain ways women are depicted in illustrated pop media, specifically how women are posed, drawn, distorted, and/or sexualized out of context, often in ridiculous, impossible or disturbing ways that sacrifice storytelling.

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I meant to do this earlier, but life got in the way.
Anyway, here are my favourites from the last caption contest (in no particular order):eliamias answered: Oooh, I love the hokey pokey! ♪You stick your left arm in…~♪
Jenny Creed answered: Red Sonja shits crooked since the warlocks twisted and melted her body in their sick games, and all too often she gets poo on her hands and freaks out.
Orion answered: “Give me those robes, I’m freezing! Then call the doctor! I think I broke them again!” 
rossini138 answered: “Ew! This tree has spiders all over it!!Did you see? They were like, *this big*!* 
gabyrippling answered:  These bottle caps really chafe! Recycling is hard! 
kjdawson80 answered:  “Damn it! Alllllllmost got a AAA on AFRONOVA Heavy!
stevonicus answered:  Curse you goblins for stealing my spine!  
msgeniuspa answered:  “The LAST thing my ice skating outing needed was sparkling orcs.”   
pachurz answered:  “Wait my glasses, I can’t find my glasses.”  
hardboiled-w answered:  Gotta keep training for the fire bottle toss… Gotta beat that asshole Simon Belmont.    
dal-li answered:  HELICOPTER MODE, ACTIVATE!  
roxxie-kun answered:  PIKACHU I CHOOSE YOU! 
catastrophicartists answered:  This so called “armor” you idiots bought me is the worst! Take this tree and get something better! And get a healer for my back!   
wincenworks answered:  Wait this is a no brand name tree you’ve tied me to! You IDIOTS! Get out there and don’t come back until you have a Gucci tree!!!   
cold-as-frost answered:  A ditto dressed up as Red Sonja for Halloween but isn’t used to being in human form so there are a few… problems with the costume.   
xogs answered:  …and that’s how Mary Sue displayed her bottle cap collection while her spine healed from the tragic, yet romantic, accident.  
drunk-karma answered:  Maybe bubblewrap wasn’t the best choice for clothes

I meant to do this earlier, but life got in the way.

Anyway, here are my favourites from the last caption contest (in no particular order):

eliamias answered: Oooh, I love the hokey pokey! ♪You stick your left arm in…~♪


Jenny Creed answered: Red Sonja shits crooked since the warlocks twisted and melted her body in their sick games, and all too often she gets poo on her hands and freaks out.


Orion answered: “Give me those robes, I’m freezing! Then call the doctor! I think I broke them again!”

rossini138 answered: “Ew! This tree has spiders all over it!!Did you see? They were like, *this big*!*

gabyrippling answered: These bottle caps really chafe! Recycling is hard!

kjdawson80 answered: “Damn it! Alllllllmost got a AAA on AFRONOVA Heavy!

stevonicus answered: Curse you goblins for stealing my spine!

msgeniuspa answered: “The LAST thing my ice skating outing needed was sparkling orcs.”

pachurz answered: “Wait my glasses, I can’t find my glasses.”

hardboiled-w answered: Gotta keep training for the fire bottle toss… Gotta beat that asshole Simon Belmont.

dal-li answered: HELICOPTER MODE, ACTIVATE!

roxxie-kun answered: PIKACHU I CHOOSE YOU!

catastrophicartists answered: This so called “armor” you idiots bought me is the worst! Take this tree and get something better! And get a healer for my back!

wincenworks answered: Wait this is a no brand name tree you’ve tied me to! You IDIOTS! Get out there and don’t come back until you have a Gucci tree!!!

cold-as-frost answered: A ditto dressed up as Red Sonja for Halloween but isn’t used to being in human form so there are a few… problems with the costume.

xogs answered: …and that’s how Mary Sue displayed her bottle cap collection while her spine healed from the tragic, yet romantic, accident.

drunk-karma answered: Maybe bubblewrap wasn’t the best choice for clothes

And for Boxing Day, here are my favourites from the last Caption Contest! :D
Jenny Creed answered: “HOW ARE YOU MAKING THE WIND DO THAT? TELL ME YOUR SECRETS!” “HOW ARE YOU MAKING THE WIND DO THAT? Oh holy nipples it’s cold too.”
Xav answered: Keep those arms stretched, for love’s sake! I know the gravitation pull is strong, but if our boobs collide, their combined mass will result in singularity that could destroy entire universe! 
Jenny Islander answered: Character on the left: “No, I do not want to slow dance! You’re drunk! Get off me!”  Character on the right: “BUT I JUST NEED SOMEBODY TO LUUUB BAAAAAW”
hotairgenerator answered: “Mindy! Listen to me! You have to stay calm! Whatever happens, we can’t let go of each other or our heads will fall off!” 
Hbees answered: “I waaaaaaant you to want me, I neeeeeed you to need me ~♪”
candy13castlesburn answered:  i needed the extra support metal corset but you took it any way knowing it wasn’t your size just to piss me off! niconix answered:  Arrggghhhhhh! You stole my cornflakes! pidgesflock answered:  How do you get your hair to do that?!   dreyabriar answered:  It’s okay! I forgive you for stealing her away from me! COME HERE AND GIVE ME A HUG!   kaelemgaen answered:  “You have your hands in the wrong place again! This is not where you put them.” These dance lessons were going to take awhile.   jaytherobot answered:  “Okay! Okay! I’m putting your head back on! I didn’t know that’s what that little tab on your neck did!”   jemstarstrawberries answered:  “I WANT TO WEAR THE WINGED HAT.” “No! Mom gave this hat to ME! Get your own!!”   sean-is-a-man answered:  “How dare thy level of boob coverage be more impossible than mine. I strangle over boob strap envy!”“Hey I’m using that neck! Give me yours!”  zagglezig answered:  Scream it out therapy became one of the most popular methods for women sudffering Escheritis. betsynails answered:  arggggghhh! The masks are stuck on, help me!  needsmoarg4 answered:  Too busy thinking “they look like those mythical cosplay girl vampires in the guise of Thor and Loki” for a real caption yondamoegi answered:  Boobs are quarreling:”It’s my turn to wear blonde head!” “No! It’s my turn, attach it back!”   space-pioneer answered:  “Dammit! It was your idea to have this guy draw the book. Now look what we’re wearing!”   i-had-him-on-the-ropes answered:  Sif: “I told you, it’s MY turn to lead! And one-two-three, and one-two-three…”   kitsune-scribe answered:  No, MY followers have dressed me in the most ridiculous “armor”.   tempest-in-a-b-cup answered:  Lady #1: I DON’T KNOW HOW TO PROPERLY STRANGLE SOMEONE! Lady #2: NEITHER DO I!   iki-teru answered:  on the left: I LOVE YOUR EARRINGS on the right: I LOVE YOUR HAT   marlo-noni answered:  I had to claw my way to the top of the Ridiculous Boobs Society! You will die before you see me give up this precariously placed crown!   rosemary-the-skunk answered:  A rule 63 Thor and Loki fighting over a hairbrush.   tipsysips answered:  Will these two women be able to restore normal physics so they can hug it out like they so desperately want to? READ TO FIND OUT!   whatifthewolvescome said:  Quick! Swap heads before anyone notices!   shiracirca answered:  “Now we must fight to the death for clothes, as fabric is apparently scarce in this world.”   kumquatmarmalade answered:  “OH MY GOD I LOVE YOUR EARRINGS WHERE DID YOU GET THOSE”   plusonecard answered:  “No! No! You’re stepping on my toe. Let ME lead!”   evilseedlet answered:  Oftentimes, the Escher Zombies will become entagled in eachothers outstretched arms as they wander the landscape searching for spines to snap   rollinginbooks answered:  “YOU BROUGHT FAT-FREE CHEESE CAKE TO GAME NIGHT” “WELL YOU BROUGHT FLOURLESS SPRITZ”   lupusdraconis answered:  And now the territorial dispute has come to a head as the fake geek girls fight for the right to prowl the comic-con.   thisiswhatnerdylookslike answered:  I KNOW YOU KNOW WHO TOOK OUR CLOTHES SO SPIT IT OUT ALREADY

And for Boxing Day, here are my favourites from the last Caption Contest! :D

Jenny Creed answered: “HOW ARE YOU MAKING THE WIND DO THAT? TELL ME YOUR SECRETS!” “HOW ARE YOU MAKING THE WIND DO THAT? Oh holy nipples it’s cold too.”


Xav answered: Keep those arms stretched, for love’s sake! I know the gravitation pull is strong, but if our boobs collide, their combined mass will result in singularity that could destroy entire universe!

Jenny Islander answered: Character on the left: “No, I do not want to slow dance! You’re drunk! Get off me!”  Character on the right: “BUT I JUST NEED SOMEBODY TO LUUUB BAAAAAW”

hotairgenerator answered: “Mindy! Listen to me! You have to stay calm! Whatever happens, we can’t let go of each other or our heads will fall off!”

Hbees answered: “I waaaaaaant you to want me, I neeeeeed you to need me ~♪”

candy13castlesburn answered: i needed the extra support metal corset but you took it any way knowing it wasn’t your size just to piss me off!

niconix answered: Arrggghhhhhh! You stole my cornflakes!

pidgesflock answered: How do you get your hair to do that?!

dreyabriar answered: It’s okay! I forgive you for stealing her away from me! COME HERE AND GIVE ME A HUG!

kaelemgaen answered: “You have your hands in the wrong place again! This is not where you put them.” These dance lessons were going to take awhile.

jaytherobot answered: “Okay! Okay! I’m putting your head back on! I didn’t know that’s what that little tab on your neck did!”

jemstarstrawberries answered: “I WANT TO WEAR THE WINGED HAT.” “No! Mom gave this hat to ME! Get your own!!”

sean-is-a-man answered: “How dare thy level of boob coverage be more impossible than mine. I strangle over boob strap envy!”“Hey I’m using that neck! Give me yours!”

zagglezig answered: Scream it out therapy became one of the most popular methods for women sudffering Escheritis.

betsynails answered: arggggghhh! The masks are stuck on, help me!

needsmoarg4 answered: Too busy thinking “they look like those mythical cosplay girl vampires in the guise of Thor and Loki” for a real caption

yondamoegi answered: Boobs are quarreling:”It’s my turn to wear blonde head!” “No! It’s my turn, attach it back!”

space-pioneer answered: “Dammit! It was your idea to have this guy draw the book. Now look what we’re wearing!”

i-had-him-on-the-ropes answered: Sif: “I told you, it’s MY turn to lead! And one-two-three, and one-two-three…”

kitsune-scribe answered: No, MY followers have dressed me in the most ridiculous “armor”.

tempest-in-a-b-cup answered: Lady #1: I DON’T KNOW HOW TO PROPERLY STRANGLE SOMEONE! Lady #2: NEITHER DO I!

iki-teru answered: on the left: I LOVE YOUR EARRINGS on the right: I LOVE YOUR HAT

marlo-noni answered: I had to claw my way to the top of the Ridiculous Boobs Society! You will die before you see me give up this precariously placed crown!

rosemary-the-skunk answered: A rule 63 Thor and Loki fighting over a hairbrush.

tipsysips answered: Will these two women be able to restore normal physics so they can hug it out like they so desperately want to? READ TO FIND OUT!

whatifthewolvescome said: Quick! Swap heads before anyone notices!

shiracirca answered: “Now we must fight to the death for clothes, as fabric is apparently scarce in this world.”

kumquatmarmalade answered: “OH MY GOD I LOVE YOUR EARRINGS WHERE DID YOU GET THOSE”

plusonecard answered: “No! No! You’re stepping on my toe. Let ME lead!”

evilseedlet answered: Oftentimes, the Escher Zombies will become entagled in eachothers outstretched arms as they wander the landscape searching for spines to snap

rollinginbooks answered: “YOU BROUGHT FAT-FREE CHEESE CAKE TO GAME NIGHT” “WELL YOU BROUGHT FLOURLESS SPRITZ”

lupusdraconis answered: And now the territorial dispute has come to a head as the fake geek girls fight for the right to prowl the comic-con.

thisiswhatnerdylookslike answered: I KNOW YOU KNOW WHO TOOK OUR CLOTHES SO SPIT IT OUT ALREADY

Okay!  So here are my favourites of the last caption contest :)  I always love how creative people are in these.
Also, because people kept bringing it up, I’ll link to Ross Campbell’s Glory reboot (which is awesome in terms of being the opposite of the old Glory in terms of art and presentation) which I’ve linked to before but it’s been a while and new readers might want to know about it. :)
Jenny Creed answered: It was at that precise moment, when Gloriana held the snowman’s cold semen in her hand, that she decided porn was not the career for her.
Katherine Dent answered: “Ever get that feeling like you’ve left your house and forgotten to do something important?”
Glitchy answered: Frosty the Snowman was a jolly happy soul

With his Real Doll(TM) girl and his carrot nose and two eyes made out of coal…
There must have been some magic in that red hat they found,'Cos when they placed it on her head she began to twist around!
Thumpety thump thump thump, thumpety thump thump thump! Look at Frosty go!Thumpety thump thump thump, thumpety thump- oh holy crud… The network is never letting us air this.
Hbees answered: Dear Santa, I was going to ask for a new bike, but first won’t you please bring this poor woman some pants…
tipsysips answered:  The little waist-stick girl: The heart-warming tale of a woman who gets a spine and a pair of pants through the magic of Christmas!  lucky-lune answered:  Strong Female Characters don’t need pants. Or underwear. In the snow.   helpimtrappedontheinternet answered:  “The quality of snow these days! How am I supposed to make myself some snowpants with this? I mean, I can’t stand around like this forever!”   iseulttoinjury answered:  As Santa looked at the other Salvation Army bellringer, he regretted taking those hallucinogens.   bewareidontcare answered:  “Ooooooh I’ll just sit here jerking off the snowma-…Oh crap wrong part of the body…ACT NATURAL.”   kitsune-scribe answered:  Mrs. Clause has been replaced by a Skrull. (He’s doing it wrong.) wincenworks answered:  As a strong, empowered woman, Glory is always does what people tell her she can’t. Today someone told her you can’t give a snowman a handjob.   anonamaton answered:  She’s on the run from the Yakuza because her parents just sold all of her internal organs to pay off their debts. Problem: No Organs.   littlemercury answered:  “…And that’s how I lost my job as the Central Park Santa.”   kallamez answered:  I received a charcoal from Santa for being naughty but a pigeon pooped on it  eartofitalia answered:  And now we see the rare white-haired glory in it’s natural habitat. Observe how it sheds it wears red and white in an attempt to blend in.  davecity answered:  Nobody had seen that kind of coloration or detail before, but Bill still lost the snowman contest. Too unrealistic, the judges said.

Okay!  So here are my favourites of the last caption contest :)  I always love how creative people are in these.

Also, because people kept bringing it up, I’ll link to Ross Campbell’s Glory reboot (which is awesome in terms of being the opposite of the old Glory in terms of art and presentation) which I’ve linked to before but it’s been a while and new readers might want to know about it. :)

Jenny Creed answered: It was at that precise moment, when Gloriana held the snowman’s cold semen in her hand, that she decided porn was not the career for her.


Katherine Dent answered: “Ever get that feeling like you’ve left your house and forgotten to do something important?”


Glitchy answered: Frosty the Snowman was a jolly happy soul

With his Real Doll(TM) girl and his carrot nose and two eyes made out of coal…

There must have been some magic in that red hat they found,
'Cos when they placed it on her head she began to twist around!

Thumpety thump thump thump,
thumpety thump thump thump!
Look at Frosty go!
Thumpety thump thump thump,
thumpety thump- oh holy crud… The network is never letting us air this.

Hbees answered: Dear Santa, I was going to ask for a new bike, but first won’t you please bring this poor woman some pants…

tipsysips answered: The little waist-stick girl: The heart-warming tale of a woman who gets a spine and a pair of pants through the magic of Christmas!

lucky-lune answered: Strong Female Characters don’t need pants. Or underwear. In the snow.

helpimtrappedontheinternet answered: “The quality of snow these days! How am I supposed to make myself some snowpants with this? I mean, I can’t stand around like this forever!”

iseulttoinjury answered: As Santa looked at the other Salvation Army bellringer, he regretted taking those hallucinogens.

bewareidontcare answered: “Ooooooh I’ll just sit here jerking off the snowma-…Oh crap wrong part of the body…ACT NATURAL.”

kitsune-scribe answered: Mrs. Clause has been replaced by a Skrull. (He’s doing it wrong.)

wincenworks answered: As a strong, empowered woman, Glory is always does what people tell her she can’t. Today someone told her you can’t give a snowman a handjob.

anonamaton answered: She’s on the run from the Yakuza because her parents just sold all of her internal organs to pay off their debts. Problem: No Organs.

littlemercury answered: “…And that’s how I lost my job as the Central Park Santa.”

kallamez answered: I received a charcoal from Santa for being naughty but a pigeon pooped on it

eartofitalia answered: And now we see the rare white-haired glory in it’s natural habitat. Observe how it sheds it wears red and white in an attempt to blend in.

davecity answered: Nobody had seen that kind of coloration or detail before, but Bill still lost the snowman contest. Too unrealistic, the judges said.

And here’s my favourites from the last Caption Contest :)
Jenny Creed answered: Do you at any point in your day have less than three adoring servants/personal trainers/cooks/love slaves hanging onto your every word and catering to your every need? Do you wish to rectify this? Consider a career in wearing poorly drawn tube shaped swimming trunks!





Jenny Creed answered: Does gravity and anatomy seem to bend and curl around you? Do people also seem to treat you as if you were literally the center of the universe? You may be suffering from Playboy Fantasy. Don’t hesitate to contact your doctor or therapist.
 steeple333 answered:  Beware of life-sized barbie dolls posing as acutal women.  
 rivenchu answered:  Save the world, adopt a bikini babe today!  
 mxc725 answered:  Global warming may be a problem, but radioactive mutation is far more serious!   nowhiteflags answered:  By the time they are rubbing lotion on you, it’s too late. Keep your eyes open for mutants.   ka-atis answered:  Why wait for Global Warming kicking in? Buy BIW - Bottled Individual Warming! Melts your body within the day!   snatching-fedoras answered:  Do not expose the Fembot 9000 to direct sunlight, or she will melt.   4thstar answered:  Cheap taxidermy can lead to unexpected results. Don’t be cheap; trust your loved ones to a certified, professional taxidermist.   theoneandonlynoun answered:  Due to Global Warming, ice sculptures like this poor one here are going extinct. Please help us save this species for future generations.  
tigere47 answered:  Beware the increased gravity on our beaches. Standing up for too long may cause such symptoms as necklessness. liligan answered:  Misspelling your sound effects can lead to such horrible side effects as torso loss in women and arm loss in men.  ladysiris answered:  No one suspected it was the T-1000 rubbing lotion on his skin!   jazmeister answered:  REMEMBER: rub your sculpture gently with the fixative gel, or it will collapse!   betterbemeta answered:  Don’t drink and draw; clearly the lady is a victim of beer goggle vision   milkynubs answered:  this image is advertising an oil that causes your nipples to disappear

And here’s my favourites from the last Caption Contest :)

Jenny Creed answered: Do you at any point in your day have less than three adoring servants/personal trainers/cooks/love slaves hanging onto your every word and catering to your every need? Do you wish to rectify this? Consider a career in wearing poorly drawn tube shaped swimming trunks!

Jenny Creed answered: Does gravity and anatomy seem to bend and curl around you? Do people also seem to treat you as if you were literally the center of the universe? You may be suffering from Playboy Fantasy. Don’t hesitate to contact your doctor or therapist.


steeple333 answered: Beware of life-sized barbie dolls posing as acutal women.


rivenchu answered: Save the world, adopt a bikini babe today!


mxc725 answered: Global warming may be a problem, but radioactive mutation is far more serious!

nowhiteflags answered: By the time they are rubbing lotion on you, it’s too late. Keep your eyes open for mutants.

ka-atis answered: Why wait for Global Warming kicking in? Buy BIW - Bottled Individual Warming! Melts your body within the day!

snatching-fedoras answered: Do not expose the Fembot 9000 to direct sunlight, or she will melt.

4thstar answered: Cheap taxidermy can lead to unexpected results. Don’t be cheap; trust your loved ones to a certified, professional taxidermist.

theoneandonlynoun answered: Due to Global Warming, ice sculptures like this poor one here are going extinct. Please help us save this species for future generations.


tigere47 answered: Beware the increased gravity on our beaches. Standing up for too long may cause such symptoms as necklessness.


liligan answered: Misspelling your sound effects can lead to such horrible side effects as torso loss in women and arm loss in men.

ladysiris answered: No one suspected it was the T-1000 rubbing lotion on his skin!

jazmeister answered: REMEMBER: rub your sculpture gently with the fixative gel, or it will collapse!

betterbemeta answered: Don’t drink and draw; clearly the lady is a victim of beer goggle vision

milkynubs answered: this image is advertising an oil that causes your nipples to disappear

Okay, so here are my favourites from the last caption contest. :)
Normally I don’t name “winners”, but two I really liked, so they’re tied as my favourite I guess:

 robotspierre answered:  “This is a performance art piece about government oppression. I shouldn’t have to explain this to you, but my ass is the proletariat.” 
positronmorbid answered:  And then Rarity hung Vampirella outside of the village. Now everyone would know what would happen if you tried to steal her hairstyle.  

:D  (I wish I had something to give people.)
Anyway, here are the rest of my favourites :)  I’m impressed what everybody came up with despite my challenge of no sex jokes.
eliamias answered: Feeling somewhat exposed in her usual outfit, Vampirella here adds chains in order to double the amount of skin coverage she normally has.

LoLDrood answered: OOOooooooh, I get it now.
Don’t you guys see it?
She went stumbling to the the bathroom at 3AM, went into her Chains and Skulls closet by mistake, and plowed right into the wall trying to find her way out.
That’s why her boobs are pancaked out to the sides, and her head is snapped back. Stone walls don’t bounce like drywall does.

Anj Fabian answered: She thought the potion would give her potent animal magnetism, not ACTUAL magnetism!
 
conroyconroy answered:  This new spa chain therapy is working wonders on my body.  
 repost-this-image answered:  “Man, this is the worst chiropractor EVER!”   buttpants answered:  Must… scratch… nose!  felipe5horas answered:  A woman that stores her collection of great philosophers’ skulls in the same place she works out at home boygenius1991 answered:  this comic is about one woman’s journey to be the ultimate olympic weight lifter. to hide her training from the world, she practices at night   souloftherighteousman answered:  Clearly, this is a detailed examination on the human consciousness and our place in the universe. But with butts.  idontthinkofmyselfasaplanet answered:  Finding chains in her friend’s wardrobe, Vampirella just thought it was the latest fashion and rushed out to get some of her own… six-legged answered:  To everyone’s surprise at the network, ‘Naked Interior Decorating with the Queen of the Dead’ wasn’t a huge hit in the housewife demographic.   tinyreviews answered:  Help, anyone? i was trying to chain my bike but got distracted…   toxic-sniper answered:  While the chains of +2 against Skull Demons were useful, poor Vampirella had exceeded the weight limit and had to make do. arse-moriendi answered:  Ella knew she would live to regret having her body electroplated.   rollinginbooks answered:  If I get my hair caught on the chain agan, I am going to safeword, I don’t care how pretty you think they look.   hiddeninplainsightranch answered:  “Okay doctor, now you promise that a colonoscopy’s a safe procedure, right? So the skulls around here are what you’ve found in the past?
 shaitsan answered:  NOW you tell me chains are last season?   higgins34 answered:  Vampirella majored in interpretive dance at Julliard. Her real name is Rachel and she is working her way through college.

Okay, so here are my favourites from the last caption contest. :)

Normally I don’t name “winners”, but two I really liked, so they’re tied as my favourite I guess:

robotspierre answered: “This is a performance art piece about government oppression. I shouldn’t have to explain this to you, but my ass is the proletariat.”

positronmorbid answered: And then Rarity hung Vampirella outside of the village. Now everyone would know what would happen if you tried to steal her hairstyle.

:D  (I wish I had something to give people.)

Anyway, here are the rest of my favourites :)  I’m impressed what everybody came up with despite my challenge of no sex jokes.

eliamias answered: Feeling somewhat exposed in her usual outfit, Vampirella here adds chains in order to double the amount of skin coverage she normally has.
LoLDrood answered: OOOooooooh, I get it now.
Don’t you guys see it?
She went stumbling to the the bathroom at 3AM, went into her Chains and Skulls closet by mistake, and plowed right into the wall trying to find her way out.
That’s why her boobs are pancaked out to the sides, and her head is snapped back. Stone walls don’t bounce like drywall does.
Anj Fabian answered: She thought the potion would give her potent animal magnetism, not ACTUAL magnetism!
 
conroyconroy answered: This new spa chain therapy is working wonders on my body.

repost-this-image answered: “Man, this is the worst chiropractor EVER!”

buttpants answered: Must… scratch… nose!

felipe5horas answered: A woman that stores her collection of great philosophers’ skulls in the same place she works out at home

boygenius1991 answered: this comic is about one woman’s journey to be the ultimate olympic weight lifter. to hide her training from the world, she practices at night

souloftherighteousman answered: Clearly, this is a detailed examination on the human consciousness and our place in the universe. But with butts.

idontthinkofmyselfasaplanet answered: Finding chains in her friend’s wardrobe, Vampirella just thought it was the latest fashion and rushed out to get some of her own…

six-legged answered: To everyone’s surprise at the network, ‘Naked Interior Decorating with the Queen of the Dead’ wasn’t a huge hit in the housewife demographic.

tinyreviews answered: Help, anyone? i was trying to chain my bike but got distracted…

toxic-sniper answered: While the chains of +2 against Skull Demons were useful, poor Vampirella had exceeded the weight limit and had to make do.

arse-moriendi answered: Ella knew she would live to regret having her body electroplated.

rollinginbooks answered: If I get my hair caught on the chain agan, I am going to safeword, I don’t care how pretty you think they look.

hiddeninplainsightranch answered: “Okay doctor, now you promise that a colonoscopy’s a safe procedure, right? So the skulls around here are what you’ve found in the past?

shaitsan answered: NOW you tell me chains are last season?

higgins34 answered: Vampirella majored in interpretive dance at Julliard. Her real name is Rachel and she is working her way through college.
So here are my favourites from the last caption contest:
LoLDrood answered: The argument over who gets the last of the double sided tape turns ugly.
depizan answered: "Trampoline dance fight! Rar!"
Aleric answered: "I believe I can fly



I believe I can touch the skyI think about it every night and daySpread wings and fly away
I believe I can soar I see me running through that open door I believe I can fly, I believe I can flyI believe I can fly”
Jenny Creed answered: “Shooryuken!”
buttpants answered:  “YOUR VAMPIRE POSE SUCKS! BEGONE!”  
rvxen answered:  “GAAHH AAWHHH NAAHH” -jaw dislocated as she prepares to swallow her opponent whole, like the anaconda she’s based off of.   ceciliavonjoy answered:  YOU ARE THE WORST IRON MAN COSPLAYER I HAVE EVER SEEN   liacchin answered:  No, i won’t let you rip this Naruto Ninja cosplay I created with duck tape and fishnet pantyhose! I spent HOURS on this!   morphic-magic answered:  Girl with black hair: “I told you my outfit could stand in place by itself. See? no Arms”   nyuns answered:  Nothing, she’s just about to sneeze.   eyil answered:  “I don’t need this sword,” Avengelyne thought, “I’ll just dislocate my jaw and eat her whole instead!”   niconix answered:  I can’t believe you used my toothbrush! You KNOW how I feel about my toothbrush…   what-the-fiction answered:  He should have known that the plastecine dolls would come to life and attack him. alas, his body now lays bloodied on the ground….   ozziescribbler answered:  Your cat impression can’t rival mine!   leftysaurus said:  somehow their expressions remind me little kids playing you can jsut hear their high pitch voices going all ‘guaaar’ ‘growl’ ‘yaaargh’ r something. it’s hysterical  
traegorn answered:  STOP DANCING AT ME, I’M TRYING TO HOLD UP THIS LOGO!   
 
long-hairedhotmen answered:  “Oh my god, this N is so annoying! It won’t freaking come off! Stop sticking your boobs in my face! Can’t you see I’m trying to get my N??”   4threalm answered:  OH GOD! I stepped on a Lego!   dumbbrunetteroxxy answered:  You are not the Karate Kid that attack won’t work!

So here are my favourites from the last caption contest:

LoLDrood answered: The argument over who gets the last of the double sided tape turns ugly.

depizan answered: "Trampoline dance fight! Rar!"

Aleric answered: "I believe I can fly

I believe I can touch the sky
I think about it every night and day
Spread wings and fly away

I believe I can soar
I see me running through that open door
I believe I can fly, I believe I can fly
I believe I can fly”

Jenny Creed answered: “Shooryuken!”

buttpants answered: “YOUR VAMPIRE POSE SUCKS! BEGONE!”

rvxen answered: “GAAHH AAWHHH NAAHH” -jaw dislocated as she prepares to swallow her opponent whole, like the anaconda she’s based off of.

ceciliavonjoy answered: YOU ARE THE WORST IRON MAN COSPLAYER I HAVE EVER SEEN

liacchin answered: No, i won’t let you rip this Naruto Ninja cosplay I created with duck tape and fishnet pantyhose! I spent HOURS on this!

morphic-magic answered: Girl with black hair: “I told you my outfit could stand in place by itself. See? no Arms”

nyuns answered: Nothing, she’s just about to sneeze.

eyil answered: “I don’t need this sword,” Avengelyne thought, “I’ll just dislocate my jaw and eat her whole instead!”

niconix answered: I can’t believe you used my toothbrush! You KNOW how I feel about my toothbrush…

what-the-fiction answered: He should have known that the plastecine dolls would come to life and attack him. alas, his body now lays bloodied on the ground….

ozziescribbler answered: Your cat impression can’t rival mine!

leftysaurus said: somehow their expressions remind me little kids playing you can jsut hear their high pitch voices going all ‘guaaar’ ‘growl’ ‘yaaargh’ r something. it’s hysterical


traegorn answered: STOP DANCING AT ME, I’M TRYING TO HOLD UP THIS LOGO!
 
long-hairedhotmen answered: “Oh my god, this N is so annoying! It won’t freaking come off! Stop sticking your boobs in my face! Can’t you see I’m trying to get my N??”

4threalm answered: OH GOD! I stepped on a Lego!

dumbbrunetteroxxy answered: You are not the Karate Kid that attack won’t work!

Okay, so time to announce the winner of the caption contest (of the above image) and therefore the winner of a free commission sketch from Girl in Four Colors! :)  (cost of getting it in a print or other medium via society6 is not included)
First, I’ll announce the runner ups.  I chose the finalists and then randomly drew the winner.
So the finalists are:
julian francisco answered: "Awww shit. Hey, officer. Look, man, me and my friend- we got pretty fucked up last night. Could you not ask about the skulls or the rope? I swear, I’m just trying to keep her from driving"
eliamias answered: Sonja to self: Okay Sonja.. just act casual. Truss her up and tie her to the top of the car before anyone asks to see your hunting permit. Deep breaths, you can do this! 
charredasperity answered:  Aw, man. The instructions on this Gigan blow-up doll are so confusing!   reluctanthurricane answered:  “My creation will win the scarecrow contest this year for sure!”   zagglezig answered:  Sonja had a problem: the sun was really bright. Oh, and she’d strangled another snuggle buddy, but mostly that sun.   lifeamongtheamazons answered:  Hands…full with choking giantess…chin…so itchy! Shoulder to the rescue!   delusionalpuppeteer answered:  Goth parents buy the worst teddy bears…   ceciliavonjoy answered:  Nothing like a good stretch after strangling a giant in the morning! Now to get waffles.   hardboiled-w answered:  “Insert tab B into slot A and then… Gah… I hate IKEA bras. More trouble than they’re worth.”\ 
luddleston answered:  “This is going to make the weirdest Victoria’s Secret ad ever. I knew they’d never be able to market the “skulls of you enemies” thongs.”   tircksyminx answered:  The Miss Barbarian judges were impressed by Red Sonja’s interpretive rope dance and giant killing routine.   accidental-zombie answered:  “Once I get it airborne, this will be the best Thanksgiving Day balloon float EVER!  
And the winner is…*drumroll*tircksyminx with: “ The Miss Barbarian judges were impressed by Red Sonja’s interpretive rope dance and giant killing routine.”
:D
To collect your prize, please contact Girl in Four Colors and let her know you’re the winner and what you want for a small greyscale sketch. :)
Stay tuned next month for another caption contest and a new artist who will be giving away a free commission. :)  (There are possibly other kinds of prizes coming in the future too since other creators have contacted me offering to provide a prize.)

Okay, so time to announce the winner of the caption contest (of the above image) and therefore the winner of a free commission sketch from Girl in Four Colors! :)  (cost of getting it in a print or other medium via society6 is not included)

First, I’ll announce the runner ups.  I chose the finalists and then randomly drew the winner.

So the finalists are:

julian francisco answered: "Awww shit. Hey, officer. Look, man, me and my friend- we got pretty fucked up last night. Could you not ask about the skulls or the rope? I swear, I’m just trying to keep her from driving"

eliamias answered: Sonja to self: Okay Sonja.. just act casual. Truss her up and tie her to the top of the car before anyone asks to see your hunting permit. Deep breaths, you can do this!

charredasperity answered: Aw, man. The instructions on this Gigan blow-up doll are so confusing!

reluctanthurricane answered: “My creation will win the scarecrow contest this year for sure!”

zagglezig answered: Sonja had a problem: the sun was really bright. Oh, and she’d strangled another snuggle buddy, but mostly that sun.

lifeamongtheamazons answered: Hands…full with choking giantess…chin…so itchy! Shoulder to the rescue!

delusionalpuppeteer answered: Goth parents buy the worst teddy bears…

ceciliavonjoy answered: Nothing like a good stretch after strangling a giant in the morning! Now to get waffles.

hardboiled-w answered: “Insert tab B into slot A and then… Gah… I hate IKEA bras. More trouble than they’re worth.”\

luddleston answered: “This is going to make the weirdest Victoria’s Secret ad ever. I knew they’d never be able to market the “skulls of you enemies” thongs.”

tircksyminx answered: The Miss Barbarian judges were impressed by Red Sonja’s interpretive rope dance and giant killing routine.

accidental-zombie answered: “Once I get it airborne, this will be the best Thanksgiving Day balloon float EVER!

And the winner is…

*drumroll*

tircksyminx with: “ The Miss Barbarian judges were impressed by Red Sonja’s interpretive rope dance and giant killing routine.”

:D

To collect your prize, please contact Girl in Four Colors and let her know you’re the winner and what you want for a small greyscale sketch. :)

Stay tuned next month for another caption contest and a new artist who will be giving away a free commission. :)  (There are possibly other kinds of prizes coming in the future too since other creators have contacted me offering to provide a prize.)

So here are the 3 winners I’ve chosen (with some consultations with friends) for the Escher Girls Valentine’s Day card contest! :D

The winners are: rhube, Silverwisp, and skarchomp!

(Their contributions are top to bottom in the same order)

As stated earlier, there are 3 prizes.

Marie Friedrich is offering a commission, 1 character, half body watercolor, character in abstract background.

Einar’Fox (NSFW) is offering a commission, 1-2 characters, bust style character portrait, full shading/color, which can be printed in 8x10 format (but they’re open to other dimensions as well).  The commission can be either SFW or NSFW.

And Ozziescribbler is offering a chibi commission, 1 character, full body.

I’m going to randomly pick who gets which prize.

rhube wins the commission from Einar’Fox

Silverwisp wins the commission from Marie Friedrich

skarchomp wins the commission from Ozziescribbler!

Contact the artists and let them know you won and link this post for proof.  Feel free to trade the prizes among each other or give them away if you’re not interested. :)

Stay tuned for the next contest! (This one will involve drawing.) If you’re interested in offering a prize please let me know (a few have already offered).

Thanks to everybody who participated.  There were a lot of great and hilarious entries.